deleting

Posted in By beoma 1 comments

i think everything is over.
musim.

i dont feel like writing anymore.

im losing my mind.

i mean. i dont know. its just . im so lost.

one whole week. messed up sleep. sometime i dont wanna wake up. sometime i dont sleep at all.

all i do is staring to the wall and to the ceiling. the fan.

all i have is heartbeat. thats all the living part of me.

i still make joke this whole week. i never wanted people to notice anything. because soon they will know that i am actually so weak.

sometime people stare at me, they know i m not me.

i still have this monday to see.

either things are going well or this is it.

everything started to make sense.

or is it actually i was so blind. yes i know i am. all i keep doing is being blind because i love it.

because i also believe that if i opened my eyes before. everything is still awesome.

now my eyes are open.

and i see. that chances are not for me.

because all this time, ive being blind.